Self Realized, Shatter Your Limits

Why Do You Fail? Your Setbacks To Success

• Linton Bergsen • Episode 83

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Step into a new realm of personal success as I, Linton Bergsen, guide you through the transformative journey of embracing authenticity and becoming your own authority. Ever wondered why setbacks often trip us up instead of propelling us forward? This episode promises to unravel that mystery, offering insights into aligning your goals with personal values and using your unique strengths as a springboard. Discover the power of personal experiences to establish true authority in your life, allowing you to minimize failures and tap into a reservoir of inner peace, personal success, self-improvement, and satisfaction.

Furthermore, redefine what success means to you by shifting the focus from external accolades to nurturing internal validation. Learn how to cultivate a stable relationship with your inner self through spiritual practices and self-awareness. Authenticity and self-trust become your compass, guiding you to make decisions that align with who you truly are. 

Dive into this empowering conversation and step confidently into a life that reflects your authentic self. Cap off the episode with a heartfelt invitation to engage with our vibrant community through ratings, reviews, and feedback. 

Let me know your thoughts on this episode. Text me your feedback! 🙂

https://www.selfrealized.com

Linton Bergsen:

Welcome to the Self-Realized Podcast with Linton Bergsen, where you will shatter your limits. I am not much into the self-help industry as much as I'm into the self-realized individual, which is you, what matters most to you, how you get there and the obstacles that may be in your way. If you would like to be part of this podcast and part of that discussion, I welcome you here with an open heart, open mind and open arms. So, without further ado, let's get on with the podcast. Welcome to the Self-Realized Podcast. This is episode number 83.

Linton Bergsen:

Why Do You Fail ? Your Setbacks to Success. Isn't that exactly what we all want to do? Turn any setback that we have in life into success. The question becomes why do you and I fail in the first place? There's many reasons why we do, many reasons that we have been told why we may fail. You may have heard not having a clear vision, not being disciplined enough, not prioritizing our time, not having the right goal-setting process Many different reasons as to why we may fail. Not choosing the right people around us, not being able to continue on and persist at something long enough to make it a success and not a failure. There is a component, however, that if you look on the internet, do some research, look on YouTube. That is very important to begin to grasp, understand and put into motion in your own life, to manifest into reality what it is you actually want for yourself. That will allow you not to fail as often, and actually is the precursor before you make any decisions about what it is that you would like to do and not fail at. What it is to begin to grasp and get a very firm handle on.

Linton Bergsen:

Is this the reason a lot of us fail is because we care too much about what other people think, what they think of us, what we are doing and how it's going to appear. We like to be liked. We like to be accepted. We want to belong. Nothing wrong with any of that except belonging for the wrong reasons. Being liked for the wrong reasons is only going to lead you to failure. It is going to create major setbacks to your success.

Linton Bergsen:

The reason I say that to you is this your authenticity, which is a word that is used a lot, is the key to you being a success and failing a lot less at what you do. You're going to fail because you're going to try different things. You will be experimenting in order to succeed, to have the success that you want in life. That's just the way things work. However, if you begin to set out on any goal setting process, on anything that you want to set out to do, without a clear vision of what is important to you, not what is important to anybody else, what matters most to you, which is, in fact, episode one, you are going to, without question or any doubt, fail at what you're doing. You cannot be a success at anything if you are trying to please other people. The background chatter of what would it look like to other people and what will they think is going to affect every decision that you make going forward.

Linton Bergsen:

Why do you fail? Because you're not in tune with yourself and what matters most to you. You have a brand. The brand is you. You are the person that is putting yourself into this world with your own unique blueprint.

Linton Bergsen:

Why do you fail? Because, a lot of the times, you are not able to own and believe that who and what you are is the most important asset that you own to put into the world without an excuse for being in the world. The authority of who you are is your authenticity. Ask yourself this question when you think about why do you fail? Do you see yourself as an expert in anything or wha t you do in life? Because when you become an authority within your own self, you automatically become authentic within yourself. Why do I say that? Because only you own the experiences that you have. Only you have the knowledge that you have. Only you were born the way that you were born. Thereby, everything that you say, everything that you do, everything that you are, comes from a place of authority. Because no one can have the experiences, no one can tell you about your life, no one can share with other people the experiences you have. Only you can, because you are authentically you. Thereby you have the authority to establish your own experiences and share them with other people and say to them these are my experiences and I say them to you with my own authority. Because no one can tell me what it is that's gone on in my life and the effect it has had on me and the effect it's going to have on the relationships I am now going to grow and nurture, if I choose to, professionally and personally. We all bring our own experiences into our lives. Therefore, by definition, you are your own authority.

Linton Bergsen:

Sometimes people will say they are an expert at something. And how did they become an expert? It's my experience and my definition of an expert that a lot of times they are book-learned. They're book-read, they have studied a book that a lot of people have also read and studied, and so they are regurgitating that material and are now an expert at regurgitation. Well, I don't need experts because I can read the book myself and then call myself an expert. I can get degrees and call myself an expert. There are many doctors out there who have many degrees and certifications behind their name. They are book-learned to a large extent. You go to a doctor. They'll give you a prescription. That's what they are taught to do. They're not an authority. They're an expert in their field because they've been to school and they've been told what the procedures are and how they need to do them.

Linton Bergsen:

Who and what you really need to surround yourself with are people who are an authority in their field. Now, they may be book-learned, they may have degrees, but essentially that is not necessarily the only place they're coming from. They may have that to establish some expertise and background to work from as a foundation. Essentially, they may override some of that book learned expertise and establish their own authority on a situation from their own experiences. Experiences give you authority. Sometimes book learning just gives you an expertise that you can quote. From my experience in life, a lot of times some of the very best people that I have ever met, who really have given me the best advice, they were giving it to me from their own experience, their own authority, and they were so sincere and so authentic that I felt it within the depth of my soul. It was something I could see within them that they owned, and most of the times when I went out into the world and applied what those people had told me from their own experiences, I got much better results than people who were book-learned.

Linton Bergsen:

Why do you fail? Because you have to know within the very depth of yourself that you are going to live your own authenticity and own your own authority in the decisions that you make, without considering what other people may think of you and what you're doing. Think on this for a moment If you set a goal based upon what it is that you really want and not based upon what other people may think of you. The goal takes a different meaning because you're not concerned about how it will be received. You're concerned about the impact it will have on you when you begin to operate from that particular place in your life. Begin to operate from that particular place in your life. Failure doesn't have the same impact on you Because it's not about people looking at you as a success or your ego being involved in your decision making. It's about your soul being involved in what it is that's best for you. It is the God force, the intuitive sense that I talk about so much in all the different episodes, that is talking to you. Why do you care what anybody thinks? You be the authentic you and you will be surprised that you can speak to people with such authority within yourself, because it's your soul speaking loud and clear to them about what it is you want to do.

Linton Bergsen:

Failure in the normal sense of the world means that you are not living up to other people's expectations or what the world would see you as or expect you to be, and that involves our relationships. That involves relationships personally and professionally, if someone is telling you who and what you should be and you are trying to fit into that mold and you cannot be what they want you to be, you may feel you have failed. It happens a lot, right, you see it a lot in life where people are trying to please other people and measure their success or their failure by how that person feels about them, rather than how they feel about themselves. And are they in fact meeting their own inner calling, their own inner sanctum? That's you. You're going to meet your own inner calling and your own inner sanctum. And what happens? When you begin to do that? You see that one of the setbacks you had to your success was trying to please a person a mother, a father, a brother, a sister, someone at work, your mate, whatever the external circumstance that presented itself to you.

Linton Bergsen:

That you were using as a measuring stick for your success is a problem, because actually it's very difficult to measure up to anyone's expectation of you, because they have their own filters that they are beginning to put on you to say well, now you are success. Are you measuring success by finances? This is another measure of your own life you have to take. Ongoing is how do you measure success and how do you measure failure? Is it by the world's standards or is it by your own compass? Is it by the world's standards or is it by your own compass? That's where your own authority and your own authenticity comes in.

Linton Bergsen:

When you sit by yourself, ask yourself this question what do you measure success by? What's the number one thing that you would say to yourself you know, this is my success, this is how I feel successful. Contemplate on that for a moment. You may want to write things down one, two, three of things that would make you feel successful. We live in a world that is constantly pushing us to measure success by external manifestations, external validations. I am not saying that money isn't important. You need money to live. Is that your measure of success? You can answer that yes or no. The amount of money that you make, the house that you live in, the mate that you have, how attractive they are, how people receive you, whether they like you or not If these are your measures of success, it's going to be very difficult for you to constantly live up to all of those external circumstances all of the time, because they will fluctuate.

Linton Bergsen:

You don't know tomorrow how much money you will have. You don't know tomorrow if your mate will be with you or not with you. Why do you fail? A lot of times it's because your measure of success is incorrect. If you are searching for external validation as a measure of success, you will always fail. It is impossible to have external validation for success. It's a setback that most people fall into as a trap.

Linton Bergsen:

The way you have success, in my opinion, is very simple. You constantly work on yourself to be able to have an inner sanctum and sense of peace, as much as you can, and calm, no matter what happens to you in life. You begin to train yourself through different disciplines of meditation, establishing a deep spiritual practice, establishing a relationship with God or cosmic consciousness, whatever you want to call it. It is a real relationship and a lot of times we are living in a world right now full of anxiety and depression and unhappiness because people don't value the relationship of the spirit, of the inner life, of the inner sanctum, constantly looking for external validation. And then we look at the world and we say well, how come people who are successful still are miserable? Because the measure of success starting out was external fame, money, all of it, thinking the right marriage, the right mate. No, that will never make you happy, because a measure of success ultimately is how happy do you feel most of the time and here's the important part of this Most of the time, with you standing in your own authority as an individual. So let's have a conversation, you and I.

Linton Bergsen:

If you are putting all of your success, the measurement of success, externally, you'll always fail, because you cannot control external circumstances.

Linton Bergsen:

The only circumstances you can control are internal. Why do you fail? My opinion is because a lot of people are not putting enough attention on the inner life. They're putting it on the outer life. They're not spending enough time building a relationship with what matters most, which is the relationship with themselves, the relationship with that which created them, the inception of your own reality, the intuitive sense of that which is guiding you.

Linton Bergsen:

When you have that as a basis and an inner foundation, you will find that success is not meted out by what people think of you, how much money you have, or who finds you attractive or not. You put on nice clothes. You go out, people tell you how beautiful you look. That's nice of you to say, or whatever people do in life. It doesn't matter what people say, whether they say you look nice, whether they say you don't look nice, whether they like you whether they don't like you. That is a consistent vacillation of a pendulum swinging back and forth. You want to get that pendulum steady in the middle. That's what you really want to begin to work on for success. And when you begin to get that pendulum steady in the middle, you can begin to make some very good decisions.

Linton Bergsen:

Now I'm not saying you won't fail. I'm saying you'll fail less. But why do you fail? It's because you're not spending the time. It's because you're not spending the time enough time to find out what it is that really matters most to you, and not anyone else. Where does your validation come from, and who or what are you looking to give you permission to be here living your true, authentic life? The answer to that question is no one but you. You are going to be your own pendulum.

Linton Bergsen:

Visualize this for a moment. You are going to be the center of your life and you are going to swing into motion under your terms and you are going to set yourself back in the center, calibrate yourself, realign yourself with self. When you have a few failures here and there, you're going to set yourself up for success and take those setbacks and utilize them from a place of centered realization, self-realization, centered self-realization that is who you are going to be. That is success. Because, no matter what happens in this life everything is going to swing to the left, to the right, doesn't matter.

Linton Bergsen:

But the most important thing is this is that you know that your greatest power lies in the fact that you can take that momentum and stop it at any time and find that inner peace, center yourself, get the information that you need before you move yourself into motion again. And you're going to do it on your terms, not on anybody else's. You are going to be your own authority and you are going to live with your own authenticity. Because when you are authentic, you are trustworthy. You're not pretending to be something you're not. Nobody's going to find you out.

Linton Bergsen:

And when you are authentic and no one's going to find you out, you are a living embodiment of success. Why? Because you are sincere. People can take it or leave it, but you're not looking for them to validate you, because you know who you are and you know what your strengths are, and you know that at any time you can find your inner sanctum, that steady center point, before you move yourself into motion, into each phase of your life and turn each setback into success from that beautiful center point of peace. From that beautiful center point of peace, intuitive guidance, spiritual awareness. That is a source of all the information that you will ever need to overcome anything that you may have failed at. Owning that true center point and knowing you have it to go to at any time the God force, the spiritual consciousness, the awareness of something guiding you on your path and using it and optimizing it is, in fact, the true measure of success.

Linton Bergsen:

I sincerely appreciate you listening to the podcast. Please subscribe so you do not miss any upcoming episodes. Whatever platform you're on, please leave a rating and review. I would greatly appreciate it. Any additional information on me, Linton Bergsen and my five-star reviewed book, Purposeful Vision, is available at Selfrealized. com which is all one word. You can also leave any comments or suggestions on the website. I look forward to connecting with you very soon and take good care of yourself.