Self Realized, Shatter Your Limits

Avoidance Won't Save You: Transforming Fear into Action

• Linton Bergsen • Episode 113

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The traps we set for ourselves are often the hardest to escape. This episode of the Self Realized: Shatter Your Limits Podcast, "Avoidance Won't Save You: Transforming Fear into Action" cuts straight to the heart of what holds most of us back from living authentically—our tendency to run from what scares us while calling it safety.

 Join me, Linton Bergsen, as I share a raw, personal story about facing an end-of-life decision for a loved one, revealing how avoidance prolonged suffering for everyone involved. 

This powerful example illuminates a universal truth: the price of avoidance is not only measured in missed opportunities, but also in precious moments lost forever, extended heartache, and diminished growth. Fear disguises itself cleverly—as procrastination, as logical reasoning to wait, as protective measures—while actually shrinking your life

Through practical exercises and actionable insights, this episode offers a road map for transformation. Write down what you're avoiding on one side of the page, and on the other side, convert your fears into specific actions. Take one small step within twenty-four-hours. These aren't just suggestions; they're keys to unlocking a life where fear becomes fuel rather than an obstacle. The most liberating realization? You don't need grand gestures or perfect courage—just consistent micro-actions that gradually expand your comfort zone and build unshakable self-trust.

Ready to step into the arena where life has been waiting for you? This episode won't just inspire you—it will equip you with tools to prove to yourself that you're stronger than the fears you've been hiding behind. Because the truth is, greatness isn't reserved for the fearless; it's revealed in those who act despite their fear. What small action will you take today?

Please subscribe to the podcast, leave a rating and review, and visit selfrealized.com for more resources including my five-star Amazon reviewed book "Purposeful Vision." Your journey to becoming truly self-realized begins with one consistent step today.

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Linton Bergsen:

Welcome to the Self-Realized Podcast with Linton Bergsen, where you will shatter your limits. I am not much into the self-help industry as much as I'm into the self-realized individual, which is you. What matters most to you, how you get there and the obstacles that may be in your way. If you would like to be part of this podcast and part of that discussion, I welcome you here with an open heart, open mind and open arms. So, without further ado, let's get on with the podcast.

Linton Bergsen:

Today we are diving into a truth that most people, I would suggest to you, spend their entire lives running from, which is the title of today's episode. Avoidance Won't Save you, Transforming Fear into Action. In fact, avoidance is a trap that keeps you stuck, locking yourself in fear while calling it safety. Fear can come in many ways into your life, disguised in your own self-talk, for example. You may say to yourself I really don't want to deal with this right now, I will deal with it later. Fear can come into your life dressed up as procrastination. It can also come into your life disguised as logic telling you that to wait is wise, when, in truth, to avoid is to shrink who you are and live your life in a very small way when, in fact, you need to live your life and you want to live your life in a very big, expansive way, in the true expression of who you are. A unlimited spirit with unlimited potential and with the ability to experience everything that you choose to at the highest level, every single day. If that is something that you would like to experience and something you would like to do, then this episode is for you. If you have ever felt that pull inside, the dream that you won't chase the conversation you won't have, the action you keep postponing because you're afraid of what it might cost you, maybe financially, maybe emotionally. Today we are going to expose avoidance for what it truly is, and I'm going to give you tools, stories and exercises so by the end of this episode, you will know how to take avoidance and fear and transform them into action. So take a deep breath, because this might just be the episode that changes everything in your life for you.

Linton Bergsen:

Let me begin with a story in reference to my own life. Just recently, I dealt with a situation of the passing of a loved one. Now, in that particular situation, there was a point where we had to decide whether to resuscitate the individual or not. Because of the need to make that decision, because of where they were in their transition. The conversation was being avoided by family members, but it wasn't helping the individual that needed to make the transition and it wasn't helping the family. So I decided to not avoid the conversation anymore and to have a decision made which turned out to be best for everyone, including the individual that was making the transition, because prolonging the inevitable was not helping anything. Things had declined to a certain point where it had become more self-evident that resuscitation was not something that could continue on an ongoing basis. But nonetheless, when the conversation was had between family members and myself, letting go of the fear of losing someone, how we would feel, what would happen, and just embracing the situation for what it was, which is a natural transition of life, we were able to come to a decision that was thoughtful, kind and appropriate. Addressing the situation helped us to release it in a compassionate and loving way. Avoidance and fear were not allowing us to not only let that person and individual go in a loving, compassionate way with the least amount of discomfort, but also allow us to move on in our own lives so we could embrace the situation compassionately and loving for ourselves and for the individual involved.

Linton Bergsen:

Avoidance is never neutral. It doesn't keep you safe. The example I gave you. It was draining the spirit of the people who were around the individual who needed to pass and also it wasn't helping the spirit of the person who needed to move on. The price of avoidance is not just measured in money. It's measured in moments. It's measured in time. It's measured in situations that you'll never get back. It's lost time, lost potential, prolonged heartache and pain in different situations, whether they can be personal or professional, that you just need to move on from and stop avoiding making the decisions that will, in fact, set you free and let go of the fear that's telling you false stories about what could happen if you choose to grow.

Linton Bergsen:

I've used the acronym for fear in different episodes. I will use it again in today's episode. Fear is false evidence appearing real. You may have heard that before from other people. Avoidance won't save you from transforming fear into action, because sooner or later transformation is going to come to you, because nothing remains the same, no matter how long you try to avoid anything.

Linton Bergsen:

Here's a suggestion I'm going to give you that you can use when you're not listening to the podcast. Write down one area of your life where you have been avoiding action. Don't put a filter on it and don't try to judge it. Just write it down. Is it that you'd like to start something new? Is it a hard conversation that you're avoiding? Is it finally choosing your health instead of an unhealthy lifestyle? Put it on the page. The act of naming it is the first step for you to reclaim your own power. Awareness, self-awareness as I have mentioned in many different episodes, is the very first step to you reclaiming and owning your own power.

Linton Bergsen:

Avoidance always feels justified. We tell ourselves we're not ready or that conditions aren't quite right. But beneath all of those surface stories I would suggest to you, there is always fear Fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of being seen for who you truly are, which is your most precious gift, your true, authentic, unique self. But here's a truth that I've learnt in my own life that I would love to share with you. Fear lives in imagination, and the way to overcome fear and transform it is by action. Avoidance feeds on energy. It only grows stronger the more attention you give it, just like anything else. The more you focus on it, the stronger it becomes.

Linton Bergsen:

I'm sure you are going to relate to this. Have you ever had your bills come in the mail and you put them aside and you say you're going to get to them, knowing that you're avoiding opening them because obviously you have to pay them and it's not your favorite thing to do? But it doesn't mean, because you left them on the desk and avoided paying them for a moment, that they're going anywhere. The only thing that is happening is the due date is coming closer and you may have to pay a penalty, so you're not helping yourself. The bills aren't going anywhere, and that's the story of our lives. If we put things off and we don't want to address them, there is a due date on them and you're going to pay a penalty for avoiding them too long, letting fear control you and not taking action to address it before the due date arrives. And, as you know, the further past the due date you go, the greater the penalty.

Linton Bergsen:

When you have time and you're not listening to this episode, I want you to think of something that you've really been avoiding, really think of it deeply, and I want you to close your eyes for about 30 seconds and imagine for a moment the absolute worst case scenario that could happen. Really feel it. Then open your eyes and ask yourself this question. Would I survive this 99 times out of 100, the answer is yes. Contemplate on this for a moment. Avoidance masquerades as safety. You may think if I don't step into that arena, there's no way I can lose. But by staying outside of the arena, you have already lost the chance to win. Let me give you an example of that.

Linton Bergsen:

I was working with an organization in all my years of organizational development, with someone who avoided applying for a promotion. She told me she wanted to wait until she was more experienced, more confident. In the meantime, her co-worker applied and got the job she was perfect for. Her avoidance spared her from the fear of rejection, but sentenced her to regret instead. Which would you rather carry, the sting of a short-lived rejection or the lifelong weight of regret? Let's talk about flipping fear into fuel.

Linton Bergsen:

The key is not to get rid of fear, but know how to use it. Fear, like anything else, is an energy. It can be raw and it can be untamed. You want to know how to channel it into action instead of paralysis. When you are free and have some time, grab a piece of paper. Split it in half. On the left hand side, write what I fear. On the right-hand side, write what action this fear is pointing me toward. For example, fear, speak up in meetings. Action, raising my hand once a week. Transforming fear into action. Physical action happens the moment you take the smallest step forward, even when your knees are shaking. Think of a time when you may have done something that was uncomfortable. Your heart may be pounding, your hands may be trembling. That's fear, but it's also adrenaline. The same rush that terrifies you is also the fuel that moves you. Don't push it down, use it.

Linton Bergsen:

One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves, I would suggest, is the belief that we have to leap huge distances all at once. No, you don't. Fear will shrink when exposed to consistent micro-actions. You build faith in yourself and overcome fear one small step at a time, like you do anything. Methodically, persistently and consistently. One small step at a time. I'll give you an exercise that you can do when you have a few moments. Write down one action you can take in the next 24 hours to face what you've been avoiding. Not next week, not someday today. Send the email, make the call, start the draft, walk into the room with the person that you've been avoiding. Take one action.

Linton Bergsen:

That is how avoidance begins to die, through consistent, imperfect movement that leads you to the place you would like to go. It doesn't have to be perfect, it can be imperfect, but be consistent and things will begin to unfold in a way that you hadn't thought possible, because you have realized for yourself avoidance won't save you and you are transforming your fear into action. For example, a simple thing you can do is if you want to start exercising and you've been avoiding it for some time and the idea of getting into shape is overwhelming for you, then just simplify your workout routine to 10 minutes of daily walking t o start. You may even have a fear of being stiff, being tired, not feeling so good after you work out. Well, a small 10-minute walk will begin to dissipate that fear as you begin to realize how good you feel and the benefits of just doing the 10 minutes a day. Three months from now, you will be totally transformed, because you stepped through what it is you're trying to avoid and any fear you might have of how you might feel by simply starting something for just 10 minutes a day.

Linton Bergsen:

Here is an important thought to contemplate for a moment. Avoidance can rob you of your authenticity. When you run from things that scare you, you deny yourself the story of resilience and the courage that you build in yourself, and also the courage that could inspire others. When you don't avoid things, when you overcome fear, you do affect the circle of influence around you, and you never know who you could be an inspiration to. So let's remember this. Avoidance won't save you, not from fear, not from failure, and certainly not from the call of your own potential. But when you transform fear into action, you step into the arena where life was always waiting for you to act. You have a choice right now. Keep circling in your own fear or break the cycle with one action today. That's all it takes.

Linton Bergsen:

Big change doesn't come from big grand gestures. It comes from refusing to avoid what matters most to you, which is the title of the very first episode of this podcast. What Matters Most to You. If today's episode stirred something in you, commit to this. Within the next 24 hours, take one step into what you have been avoiding. Prove to yourself that you are stronger than the fear you have been hiding behind. Remember this greatness isn't just reserved for the fearless. It's revealed in those who act in spite of fear. Avoidance may have shaped your yesterday, but it does not have to define your tomorrow. The power for you to move, the power for you to transform your life, lives in you today, right now. You were born with a bigger purpose than your fears. Stand tall, take charge and remember this. Avoidance won't save you. Transforming fear into action will.

Linton Bergsen:

I sincerely appreciate you listening to the podcast. Please subscribe so you do not miss any upcoming episodes. Whatever platform you're on, please leave a rating and review. I would greatly appreciate it. Any additional information on me, Linton Bergsen and my five star reviewed book, Purposeful Vision, is available at selfrealized. com which is all one word. You can also leave any comments or suggestions on the website. I look forward to connecting with you very soon and take good care of yourself.