Loyalty's Crossroads: Will It Make Or Break You?

What does true loyalty mean in your life? Standing at the crossroads of commitment, we face a profound question: Is your loyalty lifting you up or quietly breaking you down? Join me Linton Bergsen on the Self Realized, Shatter Your Limits Podcast as I explore the answer to this question with you.

Loyalty, much like fire, holds transformative power – it can warm your home or burn it to the ground. Through powerful personal stories and practical wisdom, this episode reveals the crucial distinction between loyalties that feed your soul and those that slowly drain your spirit. You'll hear about a man who gave 20 years to a company that left him exhausted and unappreciated, and a personal account of a friendship that required boundaries to preserve authenticity.

The "Loyalty Ledger" exercise offers a practical framework to evaluate your commitments with radical honesty. By creating a simple two-column assessment of where your loyalty lies and what you get in return, you'll gain clarity about which relationships and obligations truly serve your growth. This awareness becomes the foundation for transformation.

True loyalty isn't blind devotion but conscious commitment to what's authentic and alive within you. The episode challenges the notion that loyalty requires self-sacrifice, offering instead a powerful alternative: "Loyalty to someone else can never come at the cost of disloyalty to yourself." 

Through examining real-life examples of both constructive loyalty that builds character and destructive loyalty that keeps you small, you'll learn to recognize when staying represents strength versus fear, and when leaving might be freedom rather than betrayal.

Take the challenge this week: complete your own Loyalty Ledger and ask the difficult questions about what truly serves the life you're called to live. Remember, this journey isn't asking you to betray others – it's asking you to stop betraying yourself. Stay loyal to your truth, and you'll never lose.

Please subscribe to the podcast, leave a rating and review, and visit selfrealized.com for more resources including my five-star Amazon reviewed book "Purposeful Vision." Your journey to becoming truly self-realized begins with one consistent step today.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome to Self-Realized Podcast

Transcript

Linton Bergsen: 0:01

Welcome to the Self-Realized Podcast with Linton Bergsen, where you will shatter your limits. I am not much into the self-help industry as much as I'm into the self-realized individual, which is you, what matters most to you, how you get there and the obstacles that may be in your way. If you would like to be part of this podcast and part of that discussion, I welcome you here with an open heart, open mind and open arms. So, without further ado, let's get on with the podcast. Today, you may be standing at one of the most defining crossroads of your human experience the crossroad of loyalty. Today's episode number 115, Loyalty's Crossroads: Will It Make Or

Linton Bergsen: 0:57

Loyalty, when it's aligned, becomes your anchor, your foundation and your strength. However, when it is misplaced, it can chain you to pain, mediocrity and even self-betrayal. Here's the question I would like for you to contemplate today. Is your loyalty lifting you or is it breaking you? By the time you have finished listening to this episode, you will know how to distinguish between the loyalty that makes you and the loyalty that breaks you. You will not only see the crossroads, you will know which direction leads to freedom. Think of loyalty not as an abstract idea, but as a living force, much like fire. Fire can warm a home, but it can also burn it to the ground.

Linton Bergsen: 2:02

I remember a man that was working within an organization that I was helping with organizational development. He mentioned to me that he had been loyal to this company for 20 years. He gave them everything his evenings, his holidays and even his health. He wore loyalty as a badge of honor, but underneath he was exhausted, broken, unseen and certainly not appreciated. Loyalty chained him to stagnation because he never asked the deeper, more profound question is this loyalty feeding my soul, my spirit, or starving it? I would like to give you an exercise that will help you to differentiate the difference. It is a reflection exercise. You can do it when you're not listening to the episode.

Linton Bergsen: 3:06

I call it the Loyalty Ledger. Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Imagine a ledger that has two columns. In the first column, write down where your loyalty currently goes. People, jobs, commitments, beliefs, habits. Don't filter, just list. In the second column, write what each loyalty gives back to you. Energy, growth, freedom, or is it just taking from you? Look at the ledger with radical honesty, and I say radical because we have to be very honest with ourselves. Some loyalties are empowering and expand you. Others are contracts that you signed long ago that no longer serve you. The first step is awareness. Become self-aware of where you are. That is always the first step to making any transformation in your life from where you are to where you would like to be.

Linton Bergsen: 4:22

Let me take you a little deeper with a personal story. Years ago I had a dear friend. Our bond ran deep, but over time his path diverged into choices that were destructive, choices I could no longer support. For years, my loyalty kept me tethered to him, even while my spirit whispered. That inner voice spoke to me clearly this is costing you. The breaking point came when I realized loyalty doesn't mean sacrificing who I am. Loyalty without boundaries is not virtue, it is self-abandonment. When I finally let go with love and compassion, both of us grew.

Linton Bergsen: 5:14

Loyalty to someone else can never come at the cost of disloyalty to yourself. When you have time, I'm going to give you an exercise now that will allow you to commit to an inner contract with yourself. Place your hand on your heart. Say these words aloud. Before I am loyal to anyone else, I pledge loyalty to myself, to my values, to my truth, to my becoming. That is the pledge. That is what you say to yourself. When you say that, feel it deeply, sit with how that feels. It can be powerful and sometimes even frightening, because it might mean facing loyalties that you must release, but in that moment you reclaim your own power, which is what the self-realized individual is always aiming towards. Their target is their own self-inner power, through their own self-realization of what they need to move themselves forward when they have done the reflection and have become very self-aware of the transformations they need to make in their life.

Linton Bergsen: 6:51

Let's talk a little bit now about the dual face of loyalty. Loyalty has two faces. Constructive loyalty builds character, deepens trust and supports growth for you, and the other, destructive loyalty, keeps you small, afraid or dependent. The crossroads appears when life asks. Do you stay where you are out of obligation or fear, or do you choose truth, even if it costs approval? That crossroads isn't just about external loyalty. It's about whether you're loyal to your higher self, that still small voice, the intuition that is calling you, or do you choose to stay living in your fear.

Linton Bergsen: 7:55

Let me share a story with you about an individual that I knew, that was working within a family business that I was trying to help, and this particular story gives you some insight on how guilt plays into loyalty. This individual had worked at the family-owned business for 15 years. The loyalty ran deep because the family gave this individual their first shot, their first paycheck, when no one else would. But as the years passed, they decided they had bigger dreams and every time the opportunity to step away presented itself, feelings of guilt always pull them back into the business. One day they asked themselves if I stay here out of loyalty, am I honoring them or am I betraying the vision inside of me? That single question shifted everything. They left, started the venture they'd always dreamed of, and today they honor their family-owned business that gave them their first opportunity, with gratitude, not self-sacrifice.

Linton Bergsen: 9:21

True loyalty does not keep you trapped. It inspires you to rise. Contemplate on this for a moment what is the cost of misplaced loyalty? Misplaced loyalty is expensive. It costs years, energy, health, dreams. Many people only face this truth at the end of a chapter, when regret burns heavier than the loyalty itself, the real challenge choosing to shift while you still have time, I ask you with compassion which loyalty in your life is holding you hostage and are you brave enough to face it?

Linton Bergsen: 10:18

Today, let's redefine loyalty. At its highest expression. Loyalty is not blind. It is very conscious. It's loyalty to what's true, what's alive, what's authentic to you. When you stand at your crossroads, know this. Staying can be strength or it can be fear. Leaving can be betrayal or it can be freedom. The difference lies in whether you are betraying yourself in the process. So today we've walked through the crossroads of loyalty. We've seen how it can forge courage, deepen love and anchor your life, or how it can drain you, trap you and quietly destroy your spirit. The decision isn't easy, and this crossroads tests us all. But But here's the truth. The greatest loyalty you'll ever uphold is the loyalty to your own becoming and your own self-realization of what is important to you, without betraying yourself. Every other loyalty must align itself with that or it will break you. My challenge to you this week is simple but profound Do the Loyalty LLintonedger, put it all down, see where your loyalties lie. Then ask does this serve the life I'm called to live? Remember this life isn't asking you to betray others. It is asking you to stop betraying yourself. Stay loyal to your truth and you'll never lose.

Linton Bergsen: 12:20

I am Linton Bergsen. Thank you for taking the time to listen to today's episode. Until we meet again on this podcast, live awake, live aligned and live loyal to whatever sets you free. I sincerely appreciate you listening to the podcast. Please subscribe so you do not miss any upcoming episodes. Whatever platform you're on, please leave a rating and review. I would greatly appreciate it. Any additional information on me, Linton Bergsen, and my five-star reviewed book, Purposeful Vision is available at selfrealized. com which is all one word. You can also leave any comments or suggestions on the website. I look forward to connecting with you very soon and take good care of yourself.